ABC’s of Life – C for Choices and D for Decisions

The Art of Choosing How To Make Better Decisions

Hi, and welcome to S.U.P., which stands for Seek Understanding and Peace. My name is Cadeegirl5, and I am happy you are here with me on this Day –today!

Why seek Peace? We seek Peace because Peace gives us contentment. Peace helps us to enjoy the right now; Peace allows us to focus better – gives us patience – and helps improve all areas of our lives.

Busy, Busy, Busy

I created the A.B.C.s of S.U.P. (Seek Understanding and Peace) because sometimes, we don’t even realize that our minds, body, and spirits are searching and seeking to lead us to Peace. I will take a guess and say that 99.9% of you are busy, and some of you are working inside or outside the home. Probably both -Between taking care of your family, however, that looks, you may be a caregiver in your home, have small children and teenagers, and take them to and from rehearsals. As I type this, children are preparing to enjoy their summer break. I am sweating just thinking about it! And the list can go on.

Unfortunately, some choose things that will give them temporary Peace but, in the end, reap devastating results like drug addiction, alcohol abuse, and unhealthy relationships.

Purpose of Blog

Inspires, motivates, and encourages you.

Many roads can lead to Peace. Sometimes we need to take it Day by Day, Peace by Peace. I want to share stories and see how other people are making their peace journey, and who knows, we may be able to incorporate some of the ideas into our lives.

One Last Thing

I have limited time to talk on my Podcast, but by journaling (writing), I have more freedom to share. When I release a podcast weekly, I cannot be as detailed as I would like when I write. For example, take a book the director made into a movie. You read a book, and afterward, you see a film about the book.

And nine times out of 10, we say the book was more detailed. The Podcast is the Movie, and the Journal is the book. I want to add that sometimes the subject of my Journal (written) will correlate to the Podcast (audio) – or sometimes one will have nothing to do with the other subject-wise. But each week, you will get a release of my Podcast (audio) and Journal (written).

As promised, here we go! This week we are going to cover two letters, C and D.

This week we are going to discuss choices and decisions. However, choices and decisions have two completely different meanings. I used them mutually like they both meant the same, but after doing some research, I realized they both have unique meanings, and often, when reading, I noticed some articles appeared to use both words interchangeably. So, I will define each one.

Choices Defined

Choices are defined as deciding between two options, for example. You have the option of choosing either the black vehicle or the white vehicle as well as.

Decision Defined

A decision is a conclusion; you have decided on the black vehicle.

OR

I had to choose between an apple and an orange and decided on the orange.

So, I will discuss how to make better choices and how some of our decisions can have consequences when bad choices are made.

 How Many Decisions Do We Make Each Day? | Psychology Today

I wondered how many daily choices we make. Before I looked up the statistics, I guessed around maybe 1000 or so. I looked at several sources, and they said upwards of 35,000 choices a day. And to be honest, that sounds like it was a stretch.

How Many Decisions Do We Make In One Day? (pbsnc.org)

That is 35,000 decisions a day! Then I found a source that said 35,000 decisions a day is a fictitious number that was pulled out of the air. Check this link out.

You Make 35,000 Decisions A Day – Rubbish! – John Dabell

So, I started looking at my Day thus far and counting how many choices and decisions I made that Day. And then I chose to stop counting because I was tired of counting! But here is what I came up with after 1-1/2 hours

Consciously I decided to

• brush my teeth,
• shower,
• wash my face,
• make coffee,
• not go outside because it was raining,
• and feed the dogs before I ate my salad so that I would not feel guilty about eating before they ate.
• I texted five people this morning – they replied
• and I responded to all their replies.
• I decided to vacuum -and then I changed my mind

Okay, I get it –

making many daily decisions is possible. We are faced with many choices daily. Because that was under two hours, I am sure I have forgotten some choices and decisions I made in that time frame.

However, as far as the number is concerned, it hardly matters. We know that we all make decisions in our lives. Some are good and bad, and some are questionable at best. And sometimes you may ask yourself Why did you do that, or why did you pick that?

So, my mind wandered to the different decisions we make daily –

The daily decisions I make without even thinking,

• Stand
• Walk
• Sit
• Talk

Some Choices I make – Not Life Changing

• Which outfit to wear today
• Where to eat today
• What to eat
• What to watch on tv
• Which Movie To watch

Life Changing Choices

• Where to Live
• Have Children or Not
• To Marry or Not
• Pursue a Higher Level of Education

AND SOME BAD CHOICES CAN LEAD TO IRREVERSIBLE DAMAGE OR DEATH.

Our Up Bringing and Our Children

Based on my upbringing and what I saw, I believed I was permanently wired to get married and have children. Many of the above life-changing choices were pretty easy for me to make. Until I got to how many children I wanted – I danced from 3, 4, and 6 children. above all –

I wanted a large family because even at my young age, I wanted a house full of grandchildren someday. We finally decided on a number and stuck to our decision. Do I regret it, sort of – kind of? I wished I could have gone for more children. But at the time, my husband was the only one bringing in income, and the energy I had was for the number of children we decided on. However, God has blessed us with many grandchildren. And I love and adore every last one of them.  

I will share this story:

One day husband, myself, and our toddler, who had recently learned to walk, were at the mall so they could test their walking skills. We were letting our toddler walk ahead of us.

As we were getting ready to leave and said time to go; at that moment, our toddler decided to slow down and drop back – we watched, curious to see what he would do.  

We turned around to see them trying to decide if they would continue with us or go their separate way.

Would they choose to come home with parents who loved and adored them and took great care of them, or would they turn and run the other way and throw caution to the wind? They chose to wing it and throw caution to the wind.

Their father had to chase them down. Once they were safely retrieved in my arms, I tenderly said, ” That was not the best decision, sweetheart.

And equally important, we must protect and watch over the children we have been blessed with. Their decisions as children, teens, and young adults can be questionable. And if we leave them up to their own devices. I do not want to think about where they would be now.

At What Age Is The Brain Fully Developed? – Mental Health Daily

Without sounding too scientific, I  read that common sense did not kick in until around 25. Some of our children got the memo on the age of brain development some decided to wait a little later.

There are different types of choices.

Types of Decision Making (and How to Make Better Choices) | Bloomsoup

Impulsiveness – choosing without thinking about the consequences or looking at other options.

Compliance – Choosing because you are going with the flow.

You are delegating – Choosing not to do it yourself but getting others to do it.

Avoidance/deflection – choosing to avoid deciding for different reasons could be too much for you, or you do not want to be blamed if the outcome is unfavorable.

Balancing act – weighing all the facts – researching, and deciding the best option.

I am prioritizing – deciding which choice will have the most significant impact.

And I can honestly say I have done them all at some point. I was more impulsive when I was younger, and I was compliant sometimes, depending on the situation. I did a lot of delegating when I worked and had to delegate responsibilities to individuals, and I mainly gave the critical task to those who could be trusted, and I think now I have settled more in the balancing act weighing all the facts – researching and choosing the best option.

However

Even when I do not make a choice – that is still making a choice.

How To Make Good Choices

There are some choices you make today that you may not reap the benefits or consequences until years later. Such as investing your money, you will reap that money harvest if you do not touch it and let it grow. Consuming drugs or alcohol excessively in your younger days years later could result in some health issues. Smoking could result in health complications or early death. Relationships with issues left unresolved could lead to regrets later.

Common Mistakes Made in Decision Making

28 Common Decision-Making Mistakes to Avoid (franksonnenbergonline.com)

I found this article, and it had some excellent points. I will speak on a few of them.

Staying Relevant

Stay on point and get all the facts – sometimes we can get distracted by other side issues; for example, asking a direct question and getting everything but the answer to the question you just asked. Because the person has become sidetracked, define the issues and stay on point so you can come up with the best solution and move on.

Learn Your Lesson

When deciding, remember the previous lessons and try not to make the same mistake twice. But if you do, get up and try it again.

Fear The Worse

Try not to fear – Isaiah 41:1 God says don’t be afraid, for I am with you. Choosing not to go to the doctor because of fear would be doing you an injustice. Push down that fear and choose to do it and go. And if you need support, don’t be afraid to ask – because you have loved ones that care about you.

Emotions get the better of you

Do not allow your emotions to guide your choices. Suppose you are having one of those days. In that case, you may need to take a minute (But not too long) until your emotions have settled and you can think clearly because being emotional can cause you to make the wrong choice.

Taking the good with the bad

Understand that there may not be an all-good or all-lousy choice. Just be mindful to choose the best one for your situation.

Deer In Head Lights-

do not delay. All that will do is interfere with your Peace because it is always on your mind.

Bury Your Head in The Sand

I used to do this once, hoping it would disappear. It did not! It was constantly on my mind, but the moment I decided to do something about it or made a choice, my mind was clear.

I experienced Peace until I did the next one. I do not know why I used to have buyer’s remorse or indecisiveness.

Second Guess

I would second guess my choice, and there I would go again- driving myself batty with would have, could have, should have. Stick with your decision and keep it moving. Make a choice and walk away figuratively. Don’t look back. 

Band-Aid Solution

Quick Fixes are no good – take your time and make the best choice for the situation. Choosing an option because it is easy will usually not work in the long run. To make a quick decision to shut someone up or so you can move on to other things will not work out in the long run.  

Neglecting your values

Do not compromise your values. Make the best choice for you because it is the right thing to do.

How I make my choices

Now that I am older, I look back and cringe at some of my decisions. I have learned many lessons thus far, good and bad, from making poor choices.

What I learned

What sticks out for me is not to make essential choices out of emotions. If I am too far left or right in my thinking, I do not make any hard decisions when I am tired. In the morning or may even give it a couple of days. I will decide when my mind is clear, and I have prayed. And most of the time, the decision was staring me in my face.

Suffering because of someone else’s choices

The Consequences of Choice | Our Daily Bread Ministries

The first example of suffering for someone else decision is Adam and Eve. The whole of humanity suffered behind the choices of two individuals. However, the whole world benefited from one man’s decision – Jesus Christ.

Some examples of bad choices – overspending and causing your family to go without

Marrying the wrong person because you did not listen to wise counsel.

Choosing not to go to the doctor when you knew something was wrong.

Choosing not to forgive when you can.

You

Some of you have some big decisions to make – whether or not to take a job, pack up and move to another state or country, get a divorce, add on to your family, go to the doctor because you have not been feeling yourself mentally or physically, or purchase that house, car, or boat. Some of you are choosing to stop abusing drugs, do something positive for your health, get out of debt, forgive, and surround yourself with positive people instead of the toxic group you had been hanging out with.

As you can see, the list can go on.

And once you make that choice, stand by your decision. If you see you did not make the best choice, regroup, rethink, learn from it, and try again.

When you need sound advice, when you want someone who knows you better than anyone on this planet, and advice you can always depend on

God is always the answer and always will be the answer.

 In Psalms 25:4,8-9 Show me the right path, Lord; point out the road for me to follow.

God guides us when we go astray; he shows us the proper way God leads with unfailing love and faithfulness to all who do His Word.

In conclusion, we talked about our choices and decisions. Some are simple, and you can do them without thinking, and others you must consider. However, ultimately it should always be your choice. Always seek help when you are struggling with a decision.

S.U.P. (seek understanding and Peace) Journal.

Have You Had to Make a Hard Decision Lately?

Were there some decisions that you made that you regret now?

Be mindful of your decisions and weigh the choices carefully

Get your Journal out and begin to write. Sometimes it may not be an action you add to your S.U.P. journal. But a scripture, thought, or inspiration.

Next week we will discuss a word that begins with the letter E that can help us on our journey of Peace, which has undoubtedly affected all of us in one way or another.

Please comment, subscribe or hit that like button to not miss out on a single release.

As always, thank you for being here with me on this Day – today. See you next week!

GRACE AND PEACE

Cadeegirl5

In Case You Missed the Last Podcast – How to Overcome Trauma of a Bad Father. Take A Listen